


Ulajhan

by Silberias



Category: Jodhaa-Akbar (2008)
Genre: Cuddling, F/M, Jalal isn't being kept in the dark per se, Married Couple, Post-Canon, References to Illness, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, he just doesn't know what he's looking at
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 18:35:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17903396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silberias/pseuds/Silberias
Summary: "While she is ill you must ensure she gets the proper rest, Jalal. Do not pester her with your advances."Jalal felt his skin burn with embarrassment and couldn't meet his mother's eyes--looking anywhere but at her for a long few moments. When he caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye the embarrassment cinched in his gut because of her indulgent smile."I do not pester my wife," he murmured, still not actually looking at her.





	Ulajhan

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't been able to get this out of my head so here you go! Title means "confusion" in Hindi (....using my google-fu)
> 
> Jodhaa is having morning sickness & the like and no one has bothered to tell Jalal WHY his wife is so ill lately.

Jalal was sharing a meal with his mother when she mentioned off-handedly that she hoped the Empress returned to her usual blooming health soon. He had been setting his cup down as his mother spoke and had almost dropped it with his sudden alarm. He and his wife had spent the evening before curled together in her chamber as she read from a book of poetry that Adham had given him when he'd been a youth--he had never before asked anyone to read the book to him, not wanting Adham's teasing to find a way through his stubborn pride. Jalal had never known the slim volume had not been written using Persian script but in Devanagari until Jodhaa had found it--meaning Adham's gesture had been the well-meaning one of a brother, giving Jalal an easy 'out' for why he did not know any of the verses written so elegantly across the pages.

His wife had seemed in perfect health whenever she kissed away a tear that slipped down his cheek and said nothing of his grieving--though it was a rare feeling after Adham's betrayal, Jalal found himself wishing that his brother yet lived so they might share their thoughts once more.

"The physician was just leaving her this morning as I arrived," his mother now said, "and your wife was pale as milk, her skin clammy to the touch. While she is ill you must ensure she gets the proper rest, Jalal. Do not pester her with your advances."

Jalal felt his skin burn with embarrassment and couldn't meet his mother's eyes--looking anywhere but at her for a long few moments. When he caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye the embarrassment cinched in his gut because of her indulgent smile.

"I do not pester my wife," he murmured, still not actually looking at her.

"You are the expert on your marriage then, but you cannot deny that you dote on her. Let her be until she is well again."

"She nursed me all those months ago, though, surely I may at least return her loyalty by looking in on her?" Jalal finally said, his brow creasing as he spoke.

His mother smiled and nodded--and suddenly Jalal wasn't sure if he had passed or failed some test he didn't know he was taking. They concluded their meal and parted for the day, leaving Jalal to ponder on what to do for his wife while she felt poorly. She had been in such good health since he'd known her that he wasn't quite sure how to approach the issue.

The confusion and self-doubt he felt only increased though when Jodhaa appeared in his rooms just before sunset with the little book of poems in her hand once more. Her face was unlined, her complexion rosy, her eyes bright. Jalal hid his questions from her, only smiling and letting her recline against him where they sat together. Whatever had disturbed her this morning seemed to have passed and he contented himself with holding her close while she read to him.

"Stay with me?" he whispered when she closed the book for the evening. Jodhaa turned a little in his arms to look up at him, a warm smile on her lips as she did and gave a slight nod. The unease he'd been under since his mother's comments lifted and Jalal relaxed as they quietly readied for bed. Jodhaa fit herself against him then, propping her head up on one hand and lightly tracing her fingertip across his brow, down his cheek, along his lower lip.

"You are so dear to me," his wife said, wonder coloring her tone, "and in ways I never imagined a husband might become dear to his wife."

Jalal could not find words to properly respond, so he chose to take her hand and kiss her palm, the inside of her wrist, and then shifted so he could claim her lips--and later on much more besides.

When they arose the next morning, though, Jodhaa obviously did not feel well despite her best efforts to conceal it from him. As his mother had said she was pale and a few drops of sweat could be seen at her temples--and she turned nearly green at the sight of their morning meal. Jalal could not make her consent to return to bed, though, and she only allowed him only walk her back to her own chambers once she had managed to swallow a few bites of food.

"Will you at least let the royal physician speak to you?"

"Ni'mat forced me to see to see him yesterday, but he did say to send for him again as long the feelings persisted," Jodhaa finally conceded, not a little exasperated in her tone. Jalal resisted the urge to tease her, knowing that she prided herself on making her own decisions and taking as much control over her life as she was able to. Instead he leaned in to kiss her forehead.

"I am well," she said, grabbing his hand before he could turn to go, "I truly am. I promise." Jalal held her eyes, searching them and praying she was not only saying these things to lessen his worry.

"See the royal physician again, then, and so let me share your confidence in the matter." Jodhaa squeezed his hand once and nodded, letting him go after that.

The report given to him later in the day did little to satisfy him, despite the fact that the physician found nothing amiss. There was a recommendation of cooler drinks and more mild food, especially first thing in the morning, but these were not guaranteed to cure Jodhaa of whatever ailed her. Somehow the man's tone left Jalal feeling a little patronized, as though his best physician felt that the Empress was somehow not _meant_ to be cured or that her ailment would pass.

Each day he again heard the same reports from someone or other: Jodhaa was weak and ill, unable to keep her food down, or waking up in a cold sweat, and sometimes experiencing some form of sickness for part or even all of the day. She put on a brave face for him one night when he'd come to her. Jalal had only laid down behind her and held her tightly, burying his face between her shoulders and praying that Allah was not slowly taking her away from him.

He shared his evening meal a few weeks later with several of his advisors and high ranking captains of the army. As they ate the conversation drifted to the subject of diplomacy--with a few admiring words that with just one marriage to a Rajput the Emperor had brought more of Rajputana under Mughal control than any of his ancestors. This of course led to well-meaning questions of when he would marry again. The Empress had been wed to secure control of her people, now the Emperor would have to turn his eyes towards his own happiness as well as shoring up alliances among his own people.

Jalal had always allowed his advisors and companions to speak at meals such as this and quietly continued eating while the discussion went on. He did fix his eyes on each new speaker, assessing their motives in saying such things. Bairam Khan had counseled him, when he'd been a boy, that a ruler only led the debate when required of him. Emperors and kings who dominated the discussion didn't hear the rumblings of earthquakes beneath their feet. This was a situation that would require his input but first he would hear the thoughts of these men who helped make his empire function.

Finally the plates were cleared away and as one lord from Gujarat finished sharing his experiences with marrying his second wife, Jalal cleared his throat and made his own input on the situation.

"For my part I have found myself very content with marriage. I imagine that the joy of it would only increase at each wedding, but for now I bend my concentration to the betterment of my people and my empire. We should all remember that not all conflicts may be so happily resolved with only a vow to cherish a man's daughter or sister, though we must count ourselves lucky when taking a wife brings peace to more than just the man and the woman involved."

Those who had brought up or slyly suggested certain alliances now looked at their laps or even away from him entirely, shifting awkwardly where they sat. He would not shame any of them by explicitly censuring them or criticizing their words, especially not in such a semi-public forum as this, but Jalal could still make his feelings known.

Laying down to sleep that night, Jalal ruminated on the words he'd heard. When he had married Jodhaa he had looked at the match as the first of more strategic weddings to come. Now he found himself against the idea of marrying again--or at least marrying again soon, and even then in the extremity of needing an heir. Discussions like the one he'd been privileged to listen to this evening were good to hear, to have the pulse of his empire, to know what those in his court thought. Jodhaa's words, so many months ago, had stung him when she'd said he did not listen to his people--but she had been right, in her way. Jalal had been listening to those who stood before his throne every day, not those who grew his grain or wove his textiles.

A spike of frustration went through him as he looked up at his ceiling--the evening's conversation had pushed his worries about his wife from his mind but now those feelings returned to him in a rush. His mother had treated him like he had been taking some manner of test. Jodhaa continued to insist he had nothing to worry about. The royal physician did not seem to think Jodhaa needed any curative care at all, prescribing only changes in her routine and what she ate at her meals.

He hardly slept after that, tossing and turning most of the night. When he resigned himself that his eyes refused to fall shut and stay shut Jalal rose from his bed and made his way to his wife's rooms. Dawn was just slipping pink threads along the horizon as he entered the women's palace. He would at least look in on her, assure himself that she did not suffer for whatever was wrong or whatever he was failing to see, and return to his own bed.

Jodhaa was not in her bed but the privy, curled against the wall. She looked feverish, with sweat beading at her temples, but otherwise she seemed fine. The smell of sick, though, told him another story.

"My love, I can't bring myself to believe you aren't ill," he said, his exhaustion from his sleepless night fading in the face of her suffering, "not when you--you--Jodhaa it has been nearly a month that you've been like this." Jalal picked her up off the floor and laid them down together in her bed, covering them with her blankets and resting his forehead against hers. Her skin was very warm to the touch, and her eyes sparkled in the dim light.

"I can't tell you yet," she said, her voice hoarse from throwing up, "please, you need to believe that all is well."

Tears were rare for him but they burned his eyes at her words.

"I hardly slept last night, I can't take another day where everyone tells me everything is alright. Not when it seems my wife is wasting away in daily misery. Not when you hardly eat, not when you can barely keep down what you _do_ eat, not when you seem to burn with fever every day."

Jodhaa stroked the side of his jaw, and if there had been more light in the room he imagined her eyes would be dancing over his face--trying to read his thoughts that way. Jalal closed his eyes, the tears spilling down his cheeks as he did so. His wife wiped them away, shifting to cradle his head against her chest and neck.

"Stay with me until sunrise, I will tell you then," she finally said, running her fingers through his hair, "but rest for now."

So he gradually fell asleep, listening to the steady beat of her heart, and it was hours past dawn when he opened his eyes. Jodhaa was stretched out next to him, one hand below her head and the other resting on her middle as she stared up the ceiling. She glanced at him when he pushed himself up to sit, rubbing sleep from his face and trying to make himself truly wake up.

Jalal didn't understand how she could look so radiant, especially when she otherwise appeared to be sick.

"Will you tell me now, what it is that ails you?" he asked, looking down at her. Jodhaa didn't move but he _felt_ how she almost squirmed under his eyes. A blush rose across her cheeks, staining her throat and chest as well before she sat up as well.

"I wanted to wait until I was sure, I did not--I did not want you to get your hopes up too high."

Jalal stopped breathing as his perspective tilted and everything became clear in a moment.

"The physicians believe--they believe that all is progressing normally and that--"

"Tell me, Jodhaa," he interrupted, taking one of her hands between his own, "don't talk around it."

His wife laid her free hand across her belly again, pressing her fingers against her skin.

"Your mother herself said to wait a little while, to make sure that everything was well," she whispered, meeting his eyes finally. Jalal clenched his jaw shut as he looked at her, swallowing back the flood of questions she had generated. His wife extracted her hand from his unresisting fingers and cupped his cheek. "You have given me a child, my lord, one who will be born in late summer."

Jalal let out his breath all at once and then drew in another lungful of air, stunned.

"So you are not unwell?"

"No more than what is to be expected," she said, a smile lighting her lips. With a disbelieving laugh he reached out to cup Jodhaa's face in his hands, leaning in to kiss her deeply, murmuring his love for her and pulling her down to lay in his arms.

"You're not displeased?" she asked later, propped up on pillows while he kissed and caressed her stomach.

"No more than what is to be expected," he replied, turning her words back on her, "you _did_ keep me in the dark for far longer than I think was kind," he said, nipping the skin just below her belly button. Jodhaa giggled, pinching his shoulder and reaching for him again while teasing him for being jealous of an unborn child.

**Author's Note:**

> I really hope you enjoyed this, please let me know what you think!


End file.
